Olivia Blake
I cradled my pup close as he cried in the early morning hours. Somehow, I'd gone from looking after only myself to the mother of a baby and guardian of Krissy in twenty-four hours. I couldn't even think about the fact that I was doing it all alone. Parts of me stayed strong, but not enough. I'd cried in my bed more times than I could count that first night alone.
I shut my eyes as our pup drifted to sleep. He would remain unnamed as I'd promised Caleb that honour, and would keep my promise even as my mother pressured me against it. I'd heard their whispers from downstairs loud and clear. They said I'd never see him again. That I'd never sleep next to my mate or kiss him. That he'd never get Alpha back and I'd been a Luna for a blip and only that.
As the hours passed, I watched the bedroom around me fill with sunlight. I should have been in bed with Caleb, watching that sunrise. My mind drifted to the what if. What if we had been allowed back, what if Lara hadn't played us, what if Caleb hadn't sent me away that day....
I shut my eyes as the tears stung my eyes. No one would let me see him and I'd tried in vain to speak to almost every pack member beside Bryon about it. There was one way into the cells, guarded twenty-four seven, and I would never be granted access.
“Olivia...” The light knock at the door from my mother vanquished the reeling thoughts in my mind. “Breakfast is on. Your Dad is making pancakes.”
“O-ok.” I called just loud enough to be heard but not loud enough to wake the babies surrounding me on the bed. “Coming...”
The promise of food had my stomach growling within minutes. I snuck out from under the covers, tucking sleeping Krissy back in and holding my baby close to my chest. When I got out into the hall, I could hear my parents speaking to one another. their voices always echoed up the hallway much louder than they realized and as a kid, I used to sit, perched on the top step, and eavesdrop.
“I heard Johnathan was released from the hospital last night,” my father said.
“Oh that is good. It's so lucky he was not killed in that nightmare of a situation.”
My heart pounded as I kept listening.
“At least we still have a decent Beta.”
“Maybe not for long, I also heard he's planning on challenging Caleb.”
My heart slammed and I heard nothing further my parents spoke about. It didn't seem like John. He'd always been so loyal to Caleb as a Beta, even loyal to me. There were times when our childhood friendship had vanished between us, he was that serious about his position. I could not wrap my head around him challenging my mate for Alpha. I had to make sure it was a rumour...
I dashed down the stairs, making enough commotion to get my parents to leave the kitchen to investigate.
“Where are you going?”
One arm at a time, I slipped my parka on. “I need you to watch Krissy. She's still asleep.”
My mother didn't like that answer. “Olivia...”
“I won't be long. Just up the block to see someone, I'll be half an hour.” It was more like a twenty-minute walk each way but the lie felt right.
“You can't take that pup out in that weather. It's freezing.”
“He'll be fine.” I wrapped him up into the warm baby snuggly laying by the front door. Out of the very few items that had been brought to me from the pack house, this one I was thankful for. “See you soon.”
“Olivia...” My mother tried to reason with me.
“Be back soon!” I marched out the door and didn't look back. The bitter cold made my exposed fingers numb within five minutes but I had no choice but to hold the blankets up to protect my baby. I just wished I'd grabbed gloves before leaving.
“Morning.” I said to a mother and her child as I passed by. The she-wolf grabbed her child by the hood and took her in a large bubble around me. It was then I saw the extent of the situation I was in. With the next few pack members I passed it, became even more clear. They all eyed me, they all knew me, but no one spoke to me. I'd been reduced to a pack member no one wanted to be associated with. They could all hate me just fine, but I knew one member who wouldn't treat me as such. I paused in front of their house, telling myself he wouldn't turn me away.
The rumour couldn't be true and I would make sure of it right then and there.
I opened the white picket swing gate and walked toward their red door. It took me a few deep breaths to work up the courage before I knocked three times.
The waiting was worse than the walk there.
The door popped open, and the red-headed she-wolf I'd at one point in my life been envious of, stood in front of me.
“Katie. Hi... I need to see John.”
She stepped out onto the front step, wrapping herself in the sweater. “You shouldn't be here, Olivia.”
I adjusted the pup in my arms as Katie's eyes wandered to the bundle I held.
“Please, I need to see him.”
Her eyes lifted with her chin. “You can't.”
“But I heard John is challenging Caleb and --”
“And what?” She growled. “You have a lot of nerve even showing up at our door.”
I swallowed. Hard. I hadn't been expecting this backlash from her. “John's always been loyal to Caleb...”
“My mate is none of your business anymore. Now leave, before I call the patrol in to remove you.” She stepped in just a tad closer to make her point clear.
I moved away with a nod. It was clear I wouldn't get anywhere with her, but it wouldn't deter me from getting to John. “Have a nice day.” A blast of frigid wind came from behind as I left the property, causing each hair on the back of my neck to stand. I walked quickly, almost jogging on the icy walkway until I got back to my parent's house.
My baby had started to cry and I unwrapped him, checking his fingers and toes for any cold but he'd been protected unlike me. The redness in my cheeks and fingertips burned, and I ran upstairs as soon as I got inside. The tears came as soon I shut the door, streaming my blotchy face. It came as a surprise I even had enough tears left to cry but apparently, I did.
I crawled into bed with Krissy and the pup, and stared at my ceiling. The blow of Silvermoon rejecting me hurt. It hurt almost as much as losing Caleb to them. I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what Caleb would tell me to do... I felt totally useless. The skin I was in felt not of my own, but a continued nightmare I couldn't crawl away from, and perhaps I would never get away from.
I kissed the top of the pup’s head as he belted out some cries of hunger, it distracted me away from the feelings of failure and my mate...
#
The days passed with a slowness I could have never imagined. Every morning felt like I'd waited eternity for it. With the rise and fall of the sun, my childhood bedroom became the only place I felt safe. When I left, even to go downstairs to eat, I felt like an outcast. My mother had asked me to go with them grocery shopping and the dread of even stepping out of the house had been too much to bear. That morning in particular, as I slipped down the stairs with my baby in my arms and Krissy at my side, I felt that fear of leaving it.
“Morning, Liv.” My mother dropped a plate of stacked pancakes to the table.
“Morning...” I sat down and got Krissy a plate going.
At the end of the table, my dad shuffled the pages of the pack newsletter as he sipped his morning coffee and read. I looked up to see the opening page and headline. It had always been more of a gossip column than an accurate spread of information. Though the headline that morning had to hold more truth than anything they'd ever published before: Alpha Challenge! Today at noon.
It was the first time I was hearing about it and it hadn't even come from anyone's mouth.
“It's today?”
My mother sat down next to Krissy and finished stirring sugar into her coffee. “Yes.”
I swallowed. “Why didn't anyone tell me?”
My father dropped the paper. “We didn't want to worry you.”
“I'm an adult.”
My mother smiled at me like I was a child again being silly. “You don't want to see that, Olivia.”
The anger from that statement boiled in my veins. I could have shifted it made me so pissed, but the pup in my arms halted that outburst from happening. If this was my last chance to see Caleb, then I had to be there. “I'm going with you.”
“No.” My father shook his head. “It will be a bloodbath.”
I growled at him. “I can do what I want.”
“Not if you want to keep living here.” His nostrils flared. When I'd been under his rule, it would have shut me right up, but he forgot who I was mated to.
“Fine. I'll leave.” I got up and both my parents stared at me in shock as I moved toward the staircase. It wasn't working out here anyway. I didn't know where I'd go but I decided to worry about it later. I'd never found it hard to live in the moment- in fact, it had been a downfall of mine for years. Yet here it was, saving me in a way.
My father's chair etched on the wood floors and his heavy steps followed me there after. “If you leave, you won't be allowed back, Olivia!”
I turned at the top of the stairs to face him, my heart pounding as I said, “good.” If supporting Caleb meant never coming home again, I would take the chance.
I jogged to my room and packed the smallest bag of belongings I ever had. I took only essential clothing for Krissy, the pup and I. Then a few survival items, including all the money out of my childhood piggy bank. It's all I had and it would have to do.
I glanced at the clock as it flipped to eleven. since I had no car, I'd have to walk to the football stadium, where the challenge was happening. With the baby in my arms, the backpack on my shoulders, and Krissy at my side, I left my parent's house. My mother followed me out as I did.
“Your father is just upset, Liv...”
I turned to her before we got to the road. “I need to figure out my own life, Mom. Living here is not going to work... I'm not a kid anymore.”
“But, the babies...”
“I can take care of them.” Even if it meant getting a job and living in a human cityscape out of the protection of a pack, then so be it.
“Olivia...” My mother's eyes welled but I tore away from her outstretched hand.
“Bye, Mother.” I took Krissy's hand and we walked away, not looking back. The little girl skipped at my side, oblivious to the problems surrounding us. The shock of losing Caleb had faded over the days, but I still felt the pain of it. I couldn't hope for a miracle anymore, and I knew that. I had to take whatever was coming our way and be the one to overcome it. Watching Caleb win or lose was part of that.
The lines of cars as we neared the stadium turned into a cluster of pack members. Everyone had showed up to watch the rare occurrence of an Alpha being challenged. The concession was open with beer and snacks. I sneered at everyone in the line up, waiting for a morsel of food. They acted like it was a sports game, not my mate's undeniable fate on the line.
It made me sick, and I pushed through the crowd, holding Krissy's hand tight so I wouldn't lose her in between the zigzagging. She whined at my side once we got to the hallway to find a spot in the seating. “I'm hungry!”
I had some snacks in the backpack and pulled her aside, where it wasn't as busy and I could relax before finding a seat with the rest of Silvermoon. “Want a granola bar?”
She nodded. “And pop!”
“No pop, water?”
“Okay...” She pouted.
I swung the backpack over my shoulders, juggling the baby, and dropped the sack against the wall we stood near. I bent over to unzip the bag and find Krissy the snack bar. looking up toward the end of the dark hall, I saw a few men step into view that I recognized.
One of which was Johnathan.
I swallowed and glanced over my shoulder to the busy lineup going into the bleachers. My heart pounded when I looked back to see them go behind a near door. I gave Krissy the bar, grabbed the backpack, and walked quickly down the darkening hallway toward the door John had just gone through. I looked in the small window in the metal door to the changing room just beyond.
Johnathan still spoke to the men, Bryon being one of them but other than that, the area seemed empty. The men turned toward the door, and I panicked, grabbing Krissy and running to hide behind a bunch of stacked plastic chairs.
“Shh.” I told Krissy and hugged her close. The door opened, and Bryon and the other men walked back toward the busy hall, muttering and even laughing as they did.
John hadn't come out though, and I took the chance of being alone with him. I ran for the door with Krissy and hurried inside, shutting it faster than the door hydraulic wanted to.
I turned as John looked up from where he sat alone on the bench in the dark changing room.
“Liv.” He blinked a few times as I moved toward him.
“Why are you doing this, John!”
He stood, and it stopped me in my tracks. “Why are you in here?”
“Why are you!” I demanded, holding back my tears.
He swallowed and glanced at the door.
“I tried to talk to you days ago but Katie wouldn't let me see you--”
He sighed. “This is what I had to do, I had no choice.”
My face flushed with anger. “You have a choice, you're Beta! Caleb trusted you, I trusted you... now everyone hates me!”
“Liv.” He took my shoulders while looking down at the pup I clutched at my chest. “I will never betray Caleb or you. You have to believe me when I say this.”
I creased my brow. “Then why are you challenging him!”
“Because I needed Silvermoon to think I was on their side.” The air in my lungs thickened and I stopped breathing in that moment. “I needed their confidence, and for them to give me what I wanted... and that's the last position in this fight. Caleb will win all the battles, I know he will. None of these challengers are up to his level.” John took a breath. “He will win and when I go out there last, I will show my loyalty to him by submitting.”
“You're not going to try to take... Alpha?”
He smiled at me. “Fuck no.” We heard a noise just beyond the door and he swallowed. “You need to go.”
But I didn't want to because my heart had been right about John, and suddenly I didn't feel so alone in this. “John....”
“Leave now.”
I glanced over my shoulder to the door and then hugged him. “Thank you.”
He put his arms around me in a gentle hold and drew back. “Go.”
I nodded, moving toward the door and peering out the window as John said one last goodbye to me.
“Believe in him, Olivia.”
“I do.” I whispered and left the changing room with Krissy. We jogged down the hall toward the line up and it washed over me into tears. This was the absolution I had been desperate to find over the past few days, and I was so glad to have gotten it from John. Now I had to suffer through the next few hours of watching Caleb beat every challenger into the ground, to see it through. My heart thundered from the adrenaline as we found a spot near the rail to sit and I ignored every glare and whisper sent in my direction.
The speakers crackled from the announcer’s booth across the field. “Welcome Silvermoon to the Alpha Challenge against Caleb Wyler...”
I shut my eyes for a brief moment and prepared myself to watch him walk out shifted.
“First fight. Dower versus Wyler.”
My eyes opened and there he was- the long legged wolf with his stunning black coat and vicious snarl. I knew right then, whoever had signed up to challenge him was a sheer dumbass.