BY COINCIDENCE MY OFFICE WAS PAINTED GREY.
It had only one floor-to-ceiling window, which faced the main road. On the grey desk sat a desktop computer, a notebook lying open, and a stack of papers sitting under a turtle-shaped paperweight.
In a corner, the air conditioner was blasting at medium, and there was a swivel chair in the middle of the office. A bookshelf which was empty as I was still moving my things into the office and I hadn't moved my books in yet.
I looked up at the clock on the left side of my wall and exhaled, it was already passed 8 pm. I switched of my computer and sighed.
I rounded up the work for the day and arranged my papers on the desk. All I could think of was going home to have a good night rest while I binge read or better still watch movie with ice cream and chocolate.
After I was done clearing my desk, I slipped my handbag on my right shoulder and locked my office door.
My heart jumped when after I closed the door I came face to face with Noah who was standing there a hand in his pocket and a smile on his face.
I instinctively placed my hands on my chest out of shock. "Good evening Boss." I greeted, with shaky voice sighing deeply.
"Call me Noah dear. I thought we were already on a first name basis." He replied, the smile on his face not faltering.
"Good evening Noah." I corrected myself immediately, eager to leave and be away from him. There was no one in the hallway, I had closed late because I didn't want to have a pile of work waiting for me by tomorrow. Now I started to regret it, what if, he tried to do something to me, then I would have no escape, no one around to help me.
I tried to walk passed him but he held on to my arm stopping me from leaving. I turned around to face him, my hands moving from his eyes to my hand which he was holding. My brows were raised in question.
"What is it Sir?" I asked. I swallowed trying to hide the nervousness in my voice.
"I feel I should compensate you for what you saw today, so how about a date." I gaped at him, incredulously. "Okay. You have me there, it has nothing to do with what you saw. I just want to take you on a date. Please." He chuckled and I thought I saw nervousness in his purple eyes.
I inhaled, and exhaled softly. "Work was really hectic today how about tomorrow? I really just want to go home and rest." I confessed. My legs hurt from standing much and my shoe was tight around my toe nails, added to the fact that my bra was stopping me from breathing properly. I really just wanted to go home.
He looked a bit disappointed but he quickly cheered up. "Can I drop you home at least?" His voice was so soft, so sweet and endearing I couldn't bring myself to say no.
"As long as you don't kidnap me." I joked. We both chuckled making our way out of building.
He was walking behind me and it made me anxious. When we got to the parking lot we both stopped and stared at each other. "I can't leave my car here." I muttered, shivering from the cold.
"Who said you would?" He smiled. "I will take you home in yours." He stretched out his hands and I gave him my keys.
"Thank you."
"I don't want you driving home late." I smiled.
***
The ride to my house was quiet with no conversations. I leaned my head on the window the whole time trying to calm the subtle ache in my skull. It felt like my forehead was about to be ripped out of my skin.
Luckily, Noah didn't speak until we got to my house.
We just listened to the slow county songs that played on the radio. The silence between us was comfortable, warming and sweet.
When we got to my house, the security man opened the gate for him even before he could horn. He parked in between my range rover and Mercedes then he came down and turned around to open the door for me.
"Thank you." I said, stepping out... watching him as he closed the door. "How are you going to get home?" I asked him as he was handing the car key back to me.
"You are worried about me?" He smiled, genuinely.
The moon Illuminated his eyes and made them all the more beautiful like the ocean in the dark where the moon touched it with all it's fullness. His smile lightened up his face and I could not help but smile too.
"Of course I am worried about you. You drove me home, didn't you?" We both stood there gaping at each other. I laughed nervously and dipped my hands into my bag for my house key.
"I would call my driver." He finally replied. I nodded, finally finding my key.
"Do you want to come in for a cup of coffee maybe? Its a bit cold outside at least until your driver comes." I asked, turning to the door. My hands shook as I tried to put the key into the keyhole.
I was much too aware of his presence, him standing behind me, his hands in his pockets watching everything I was doing. I would have been scared if it were any other man standing by my door this late at night, but with him I wasn't.
Yes, my heart was beating faster than usual and my hands were unsteady, but it was nervousness I was feeling not fear. It was desire, expectation.
I finally opened the door amidst my trembling heart. Holding the door Ajar I took in his whole countenance. His eyes, his short hair, his white skin perfectly tucked in expensive suit. I swallowed, feeling a certain sensation in between my thighs. "So? Are you coming in?" I asked, with a shy smile.
"With the way you are looking at me now I doubt if I have a choice."
We both chuckled.
"Well you do have a choice." I replied, anxiously shifting from one foot to the other. My throat suddenly felt so dry I wanted nothing more than to have a drink, preferably red wine.
"It's cold out here." He finally replied stepping on the porch. I let him in and closed the door. He stood at the door taking in my house. He had this smile on his face that remained there so I didn't know exactly what he was thinking I just stood by the side watching him.
"Your house is beautiful." He complemented running his hands over my grey couch. "Grey, such a fascinating color." He looked over at me with a smile, a smile that held secrets, as if he was figuring me out. I looked away and dropped my jacket on one of the couches.
"Let me make the coffee. Sugar, milk?"
"Just sugar. Not really a fan of milk." He replied.
I giggled a bit rolling my eyes, then I turned to the kitchen to make the coffee. When I was done, I came out and found him standing in front of one of my paintings. He was running his hands through it, and his eyes were closed.
"Noah." I whispered, now standing by his side. He was a bit startled, he probably did not expect me to be out of the kitchen so soon. "Here." I said, stretching the cup to him. He took the cup from my hands and took a sip while I waited with my breath hitched in my throat.
"Not bad." He smiled. I released the breath I was holding and took a sip of my own. Then we both turned to the painting he had been looking at. It was a painting of a white lion with scars on his face, I had paid the painter a whole lot of money for it and it had been worth every penny. It was my best painting yet.
"It's fascinating." Noah complemented. Running his hands through the painting again. He looked transfixed.
It was then I saw it, the god mark in between his thumb. My eyes watered immediately and I started to choke on my own spittle.
He noticed my struggle to breath and turned around. "Hey calm down." He soothed, rubbing my back gently. He took my hands and led me to one of my sofas, still with a worried expression on his Face.
His hands did not leave my back the whole way.
I could feel tears well up in my eyes and I just let them fall. I didn't want to hold them back anymore, I couldn't hold them back anymore. He dropped his tea cup on the middle table and dropped mine too.
He lifted himself from the rug where he had been sitting, up to the couch. "Just breathe for me Mira."
"Why?" I kept asking as I sobbed. "Why did you lie to me?" My voice was shaky and rusty. My hands were sweaty, my heart was beating fast against my chest and I feared that my mind would shut down at any moment, but I wanted answers.
He turned my head to face him, looking straight into my eyes, wiping the tears on my cheek. His eyes were filled with love, remorse, fear, lust, pain and passion. "What are you talking about, Mira?" He whispered.
"Why did you lie to me Scar." I replied, slowly, purposefully. He stared at me mouth slightly parted, eyes wide and soon not only was it my heart beating fast, his was too.
He tried to get up from the sofa but I held him back holding his hands. He still managed to get up though, I joined him. We were both standing, gazing at each other, our hearts raging hard, fighting to be let out.
"I don't know what you are talking about Mira." He promised, he was lying through his teeth and we both knew it.
I flared up. Rage, pain all these emotions were dominantly pressing against my chest, stopping me from breathing. "Don't treat me like I'm fucking stupid Noah! I know who you are!" I yelled.
"Can you please calm down." He said softly, trying to hold my waist but I hit his hands and pushed him away hard even though he didn't really move back much seeing that I didn't have the force to do so.
"Tell me the truth now or you will never see me again." I threatened, clenching my jaw tightly.
"There is nothing to tell you." He whispered. Nothing. "Just calm down whatever you think you saw.."
"Leave!" I screamed. "Leave before I call the police and have you arrested for harassment!"
I turned on my heels and ran upstairs as tears fell down my face. When I got to my room I closed the door hard and slumped on the bed. He knocked once, twice then he let himself in when he knew that I would not open.
An alarm was by my bed side table which connected straight to the city police so I was not afraid and I knew that he won't hurt me. He would not, would he?
"Mira listen to me. Please." He begged, walking in to stand in front of me.
"You will never see me again Noah. I promise." I sobbed softly. "Now leave please." My voice was firm, free of any doubt or fear.
"What do you want me to tell You?" He mumbled running his hands through his head. "Tell me." He sounded like his heart was breaking and it hurt me to hear the crack and desperation in his voice.
But I needed to know the truth, his eyes, him calling me Reina, the familiarity of his kiss, his voice, his smile, and his goddamn god mark. There were too many clues for it to be just a coincidence, I wanted the truth. I had been kept in the dark for so long, I wanted the truth.
"The truth Noah. Nothing but the truth." I replied softly. My voice was low and pleading.
"And If I tell you the truth you promise not to leave me. Do you promise." He begged, falling to his knees in front of me. Our eyes met and remained fixed.
My heart was racing out loud and in that moment I wanted nothing more than to kiss him, nothing more, but I wanted the truth much more.
I looked away from him even though his lips, his smell, his eyes, even though all of it was a summon.
"You are in no position to request anything." I choked out.
"Mira." He pleaded. The way he called my name was too irresistible for me to ignore. I just had to look at him. He called not just my name, but my soul, my heart, my body and it was too big a fight for my mind to conquer.
"Tell me Noah. Tell me that you are not Scar. Lie to me again. Break my heart again. Deceive me again. Or are you not tired of hurting me? Of lying to me. Of rearranging my life to suit yours. Of keeping me in the dark. Are you not tired of hurting me Noah! Answer me." I screamed, holding the collar of his shirt, squeezing it as tears fell down my eyes in quick succession.
His eyes were cloudy too from unshed tears. He held on to my hands clasping them with his big hands then he sighed and brought me into a hug. My legs were wrapped around his waist and my head buried in his shoulders as I cried. But even with all the pain I was feeling even with how hurt I was desire clanged to my skin.
I was wet and in need of him. Of the forbidden fruit I should have tasted a long time ago.
"I never meant to hurt you Mira. On the contrary that's what I was trying to prevent. I didn't want to change you. I wanted you leave the life of your dreams. I didn't want you to be among the statistics women who fell for gang leaders and lost themselves. I wanted you to achieve your dreams, to live the life you always saw yourself living."
"To love the kind of man your mother would approve of, the kind that your conscience would approve of. I would have left you but I could never bring myself to do it. You became my everything from the moment I set my eyes on you."
"When I saw you, for the first time I knew that you had to be mine. For the first time I would be fighting a fight that was mine and not my fathers or others, a fight for what I loved deeply and I didn't want to lose." He sighed.
"You brought light into my world and even though for a while the darkness still prevailed because it had been who I was for the longest of time, I still did not want to lose hope on you or the light. It was you, you, you, that was all that mattered to me then and now. I did it all to protect you and I know that I am the biggest hypocrite in the world for calling out your demons only to help you slay them but then I could not think of anything else. I just wanted to have you but I didn't want you to lose you."
I wiped my face with the back of my palm, disentangling from his embrace. Then I slapped him hard, once, twice.
I was filled with rage and anger, and love. It was driving me insane. "So Sophia was right?!" I asked pointing at him. "You sent Ken after me, you sent Sophia after me, you faked your own death! And you scared me away from my country just so that I could be with you!" I yelled pushing him away. I stood up with shaky feet, glaring daggers at him.
"I never asked Ken to do those things he did, he was acting on his own accord. I swear to you." He whispered, standing up.
"You liar! Stay back! Stay away from me." I warned.
"I never did. I never. I was too scared to tell you the truth myself so I asked Sophia to tell you, but you loved me too much to believe her. I believe in your love for me Mira so I wanted to change, for you and for myself and for that I had to die but there was not a moment where I haven't watched over you, when you were in the hospital, when you were at the university, when you came over here."
"You never left my mind. It was always you. Everything I have done has always been for you, you are the first and the last thing on my mind every fucking day."
He started to walk closer to me, with each step he took forward I moved back until I was backed up against the wall just like the first time we met.
Although the memories of the first time barely ever came back, bits of it reoccurred in my mind and this was one of them.
"Stay back. Don't come close to me." I said, but I knew my warning held no virility or strength. My voice was soft and weak. He had gotten into me, he always does and deep down, deep down I knew that I still wanted him but I couldn't have him. First he was a criminal, it just wasn't right...
"I have changed Mira. I went to college, I saved a mans life, I have fought the good fight all for you Mira." He whispered. A tear drop fell from his eyes and I wanted to wipe it off, but he was faster than I was.
I swallowed hard. "Changing your name doesn't make you any less of a killer than you are." Him being so close to me was weakening me in ways I didn't want to admit, in ways I didn't want him to. "It doesn't." I repeated almost choking on my own words.
He laughed but it was humourless; a sad, bitter laughter. "You think I don't know that? I more than anyone should know that it doesn't change anything but I will spend my life looking for redemption for my sins." He inhaled deeply, taking in my scent. "I love you Mira. More than anything in the world. You are the light of my world."
"You don't know what love is." I scoffed. "Leave." I muttered even though within me in my heart of hearts I knew that I didn't want him out of my sight for even a second.
He came closer and closer now so that we were almost one body. Our nose were touching now, he looked downcasted as If the whole world was resting on his shoulders.
"Can I kiss you? Just this once." He whispered.
The sheer tenderness of his voice almost drove me to a voice induced orgasm.
My heart accelerated, hard and fast. I closed my eyes embracing the darkness behind them. Burying myself in the realization that I just found Scar and the truth.
It was all so overwhelming.
I wanted someone to take it all away, all the darkness behind my eyes. I wanted to bury all my troubles in his lips while I let myself melt in his arms.
There was, between us a heavy, magnetic desire. It was as if being tired made me even more horny and in need.
Never in my life had I felt the urge to have a man kiss me, touch me, love, me as I felt right then. It was so powerful a feeling, it was blinding. All fight left my body leaving me feeling blissful.
"Yes.. You can kiss me." I stuttered, refusing to open my eyes. His eyes could charm me, I had to prevent it.
His breath fanned my face and I breathed in his air. He cupped the back of my neck, whilst teasing me with his lips.
I trembled. My hands, my legs, my heart all of it was shaking so much like leafs in harmattan. He was teasing my lips but it might as well had been my whole body.
I leaned forward and kissed him unable to bear the torture anymore. He was unsure, I wasn't. I knew what I wanted and I wanted to taste him again. To taste my Scar again.
At first he was slow in his response, first savoring my lips as if he could not believe that he was finally kissing me. He played with my bottom lip instilling a moan from me which seemed to have turned him on bad.
He deepened the kiss completely taking control of it, thrusting his tongue into my mouth, biting my lips.
There was a gasp, moan and groan and then he was ripping off my shirt, the buttons scattered everywhere. His mouth did not leave my lips even as he pushed down my bra cups to free my firm breast.
I remembered clearly the firmness of his lips, but there was, also, a newness to his touch and to my response. It was one that came with age, truth and freedom.
Our lips were familiar to each other but his hands, my body, it was all new and it was beautiful.
Before I knew it I was taking of his suit and his shirt and running my hands through the tattoo on his chest. The ones I remembered, it was really him. It was. I touched the scar on his chest, remembering it again. "There was no day that passed that I did not think of you." I whispered, my voice sounding sadder than I wanted it to.
I bent lower so that I could kiss him from the nape of his neck to his hard chest. I kissed the lion tattoo there on his rib which was almost fading.
He gasped and held unto my hair, then he made me look at him. Our eyes locked together, our hearts beating in one rhythm and before I could say even another word, before I could think of what was going on between us, of the consequences of what we were doing he kissed me yet again, passionately, like It was going to be the last time he would get to do it and maybe it would.
There was a possibility that we would never see each other again, there was a possibility that it was all coming to an end but this knowledge did nothing to quench my desire instead it inflamed it.
He was taking of my skirt and I was helping him take off his pants and soon we stood naked close to the bed.
His lips did not leave mine even as he pushed me on the bed and I gasped, out of desire, out of expectation.
My heart was throbbing hard against my ribcage as I was well aware that this would be my first time.
I was ready for it though, I was so ready for it. I didn't want it to be with anyone else, but him. He slowly pushed me onto the bed so that my head rested comfortably on the pillow.
"I don't have condoms here with me." He whispered.
I exhaled, deeply and inhaled then my lips were crashing into his again. "You don't need them. Please I want this."
"Are you sure?" He asked, pulling away from the kiss, I leaned forward to take his lips again.
"Why, are you infected?" I moaned into his lips.
He chuckled drily. "From the first day I kissed you no other woman has gotten near any part of my body. You claimed me that day Mira just the same way, I possessed you." He whispered, biting my bottom lips.
"Ahh.." I groaned. "Just.. Just.. Do it."
He kissed my cheeks and his lips lingered there. "Are you sure?"
"I am. I have always wanted you to do this from the first time we met." I moaned, loving the sensation his lips were searing through my veins.
He smiled caressing my face and pushing my hair back so that he could look straight into my eyes in the dark night. My room was only illuminated by the moon which slipped its light through the open curtains. It was the light, and him; everything was so perfect.
"Nothing would have prepared me for this moment. Nothing. I desire you more than anything, more than the air I breathe."
He pushed my knees up and settled himself in between them.
I closed my eyes in anticipation, loving the pounding of my heart in my ears.
"Mira, Look up at me. It's your Scar." He whispered.
A smile appeared on my face and I slowly tore my eyes open. "Yes. It is."
He groaned, and without warning thrust into me, slowly at first so that I could adjust to his veiny long dick and his pace.
He moaned closing his eyes in pleasure. He was holding his desire, restraining himself from taking all of me and giving me all of him and I knew it.
I wanted all of him though.
When the pain had subsided so that the pleasure outweighed it by a good difference I lifted my hips so that he could thrust in harder and faster while I thrashed the bed and moaned out like my life depended on it.
He was slow but he filled me in.
The times when I could look into his eyes they were filled with so much love I gasped.
The moon settled on his face and I watched him as he thrust deeply inside me, his lips giving way for an occasional moan.
He bent down and nibbled on my neck causing me to moan out loud. He groaned and thrust in harder. "God this is everything. You are everything that I need, everything that I want." He whispered as he began to thrust in harder and faster. I soon started to feel a beautiful mind blowing sensation below my bellybutton down to my core.
It rippled me and turned me inside out. I screamed out in pleasure and he growled responding to his own gust of pleasure and orgasm.
He slumped on the bed and I laid on him, my eyes shutting down slowly. We stayed silent for a while, as quiet as the night. Every strength that existed in my body had been fucked away literally.
"Mira, we still have unfinished business." He whispered breaking the silence.
"We do. Tomorrow we will talk about it all." I yawned. He intertwined his fingers with mine and caressed my back while singing to me. And just like I had predicted so many years ago his voice was beautiful.